Help for today & Hope for tomorrow

Time does NOT heal wounds!

So, it has been 3 years almost since I lost my boyfriend. I was 14 at the time when he died, and he was 16. I know people will think I am crazy when I say this, but I loved him. I really, really did. I was not too young. Sometimes you just know. But it will be 3 years October 12, and I am still in a depression like state. I cry all the time, I look for him when I'm in crowds, or at least look for somebody who reminds me of him. It has affected my past relationships. I am terrified I am going to date somebody again and loose them unexpectedly too. Or, I compare them with Ryan. It is not getting easier for me, and being a teenager it hurts. I don't know what to do. And its hard because I try to put on a fake smile when I'm at school or around people, because I don't want to let them know I am still in this state of pain. I know the people at school would call me stupid for it or make fun of me for grieving this long. I just miss him so much...

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Permalink Reply by Judy Davidson on June 9, 2014 at 9:36am

Thank you for sharing your story and feelings, Alaina. I am so sorry for your loss. Grief sucks, huh? I know from first hand experience that communication is key to recovery, so you're doing the right thing in sharing. He and the memories of yoru relationship will always be a part of you.

I hope the blog posts, videos and chat room help you. Sharing in a group also helped me a lot - check out www.GriefShare.org.

Warmly,

Judy

Founding GHN member

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Permalink Reply by Lulu on June 9, 2014 at 8:56pm

You're never to young or old for love. Ryan was a great person and your love for him is obviously great. And this is one of the reasons your grief as taken this long. All tho everyone griefs different because the losses are different and the loved ones are unique. Sometimes grief is forever but that doesn't mean you wont heal or love again it means you will always remember Ryan for the wonderful person he was.

If you're not ready for a new relationship don't force it, things will fall into place with time. And never let anyone make you feel crazy or stupid for grieving his loss. when you have true love its so beautiful and hard to forget. I know you miss him I could relay with that I also lost a wonderful man I was dating and i would do anything to see him again. I know for a fact I will never forget him but i also know that i need to set him free and enjoy my life sometime in the near future.

I pray you find comfort in this site and i pray life gives you the opportunity to find a wonderful man again that is worthy of your caring heart.