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Susan Derry-Penz
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Susan Derry-Penz's Discussions

Why did I have to watch over my mother for four days in palliative care.

Started this discussion. Last reply by Susan Derry-Penz Jan 23. 8 Replies

Hello,My 89 year-old mother passed away on 26/5 after four days in palliative care. I was her principle carer.I was told that I could not feed her or even give her water as she was on intravenous…Continue

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Susan Derry-Penz replied to Susan Derry-Penz's discussion Why did I have to watch over my mother for four days in palliative care.
"Dear Edward, I have just read your beautiful reply. Thank you. If only I could be sure that she knew I was there at the end..."
Jan 23
Edward Janne replied to Susan Derry-Penz's discussion Why did I have to watch over my mother for four days in palliative care.
"Dear Susan, I recently went through a similar experience with my husband of 28 years. I had stopped working and given up all my hobbies an passions to care for him as his health declined over several years despite all my efforts. I watched him pass…"
Jan 14
Joanne Solis replied to Susan Derry-Penz's discussion Why did I have to watch over my mother for four days in palliative care.
"I cannot begin to imagine what you are going through, as I am currently watching over my mom who is in palliative care right now for her pancreatic cancer. She simple started saying her good byes to us and I really don't know what to do at this…"
Dec 3, 2019
Susan Derry-Penz replied to Susan Derry-Penz's discussion Why did I have to watch over my mother for four days in palliative care.
Jun 22, 2019
Susan Derry-Penz replied to Susan Derry-Penz's discussion Why did I have to watch over my mother for four days in palliative care.
Jun 22, 2019
Dennis replied to Susan Derry-Penz's discussion Why did I have to watch over my mother for four days in palliative care.
"Hi Susan, am so sorry for your loss, I also lost my mother on the 12/05 and I also helplessly watched her die, while EMS specialists tried to resuscitate her. I feel like I called them too late and I feel such guilt as well, I don't have…"
Jun 21, 2019
AniLo replied to Susan Derry-Penz's discussion Why did I have to watch over my mother for four days in palliative care.
"Words fail in pain such as this, Susan.  These memories are designed by The Evil One to torment, and in a sordid way, it makes sense that perhaps if you don't stop feeling guilty, you feel that perhaps you will pay for the pain, you are…"
Jun 8, 2019
Susan Derry-Penz posted a discussion

Why did I have to watch over my mother for four days in palliative care.

Hello,My 89 year-old mother passed away on 26/5 after four days in palliative care. I was her principle carer.I was told that I could not feed her or even give her water as she was on intravenous morphine and another drug to stop her agitation, so if I gave her water or food she might choke or it would just prolong her death.I just held her hand and watched as she hungrily sucked on the mouth swabs I used to clean her mouth.At various times she would attempt to remove the oxygen tubes from her…See More
Jun 7, 2019
Susan Derry-Penz is now a member of GriefHope
Jun 5, 2019

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My mother died last week. I was her principle carer. I watched over her four four days in palliative care. I am finding it hard to function

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