GriefHope

Help for today & Hope for tomorrow

The love of my Life died in Dec of 2011, we were married for 32 years and have 3 great kids, I have had a difficult year, I have a big family with 5 sisters and 2 brothers they have been great but they have their own life. I have been a nurse for 30 years but have been unable to function and quit last spring, I am still not working and have anxiety every time I think about it. I still cry daily and I am unable to sleep most days. I don't know when this dark place will go away. I always feel better after I talk to someone, but I think my sisters don't know what to say anymore. And I make them cry too. I knew this would be hard but I never imagined it would be this hard. I have said the hardest part of grief is how others treat you, I had a fellow nurse after one month of grief say that I just needed to get over it. Those words are burned into my soul and made everything worse. I have never been in a chat room before, but maybe it will help.

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Comment by maryellenmcquown on December 23, 2012 at 6:07pm

if someone tells you to just get over it , then you ask them if they have lost anyone close to them and i have found that most have not and it is hard for them to know what to say so they will often say the wrong things  the best thing is to say i am sorry for your loss and that is what i am going to say i am so sorry for the loss of our spouse 

Comment by Fran Gambino on December 27, 2012 at 6:57pm

I am sorry to hear the insensitivity that you have experienced.  There is a lot of this out there.

I have been really hurt by others, including other christians.  It is very hard.

Comment by Laurene Johnson on January 12, 2013 at 7:51am
I had been doing really well since Nov. nothing special just made a turn. I have been living in Minnesota caring for my Dad for months after he had a fall. So after Christmas one of my sisters gave me a break and I came home for a few weeks, I wished I had not. I love my children and miss them wanted to spend my time with them. But Michaels family wanted to see me, and his mother was just cruel making side comments, etc. the worst is when she starts in about me returning things from my house that was given to me. Some of the items I have had for 30 years. I try very hard not to just snap on her, but it is getting harder, so I won't be back rather than tell her just what I think of her. I told his sister to make a list and I would consider returning items, then my house is off limits and I will not let anyone have anything. Keep on mind I thought we had a good relationship until my husband died, and I have grown children so the heirlooms belong to them. I could understand if I was childless. But the worst is my Mother in law starts about have you found a man yet, I thought you would be married by now, Michael and I were married for 32 years and together for 33, he was my everything, my soulmate, and best friend. Anyone who knows me knows I will never date again. She does it to hurt me, just to make sure I know she never thought he loved me that much. It is all I can do not to tell her what he really thought of her. But I am not a mean and cruel person, perhaps that is why I can not do it to her. I should pray for her soul, so she does not rot in Hell.
Comment by maryellenmcquown on January 12, 2013 at 7:55am

thanks for the comment 

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