Filled with Sadness

[Heather]

A week ago tomorrow I lost the love of my life and the father of our almost 2yr old son. He had been walking in the middle of the night, apparently had fallen in the road and an oncoming car hit him. I'm not sure that this will ever get any easier and what do I say to my innocent child who asks me where's his da-da? Im trying not to replay questions in my head, what if i had called him that night?? What if i had just let him stay here for the night like he wanted?? But thats a hard thing to do! I just Want him back so badly and every little thing reminds me of him

[Judy Davidson]

Heather,

I am SO SORRY for your loss.  Thank you for sharing part of your story and feelings.  I have been in your shoes along with many others on this site.  My husband died when our son was 4.  I know how difficult and overwhelming life is right now.  Please reach out to others and get the support an help you need locally and online.  I hope you find some comfort on the blog posts and expressing your feelings on the chat room.  Please let us know what we can do to help.

God bless you and your son,

Judy Davidson

Founding member 

[Lulu]

Hi Heather! sorry for you and your baby loss. I know that feeling of guilt all to well. Please don't let it consume you. I pray you find comfort in your heart. We are here to help. I also lost a wonderful man and i know the emptiness of not having him around. We have hope in the people that care for us our faith and this site.

[Heather]

Thank you both. I know they say with time comes healing, but it seems like a lifetime away

[Lulu]

There is no easy way out . But time will be a friend of us someday. Take care of yourself and your beautiful son.

[Chris Fayne]

Heather, I know how you feel. This weekend marks 2 months since I last heard my fiance say I love you. She had 3 little girls. I know it's hard and I know it's not easy, but you have a little boy that needs you and there are lots of ways you can always let your son know just what kind of father he had.

[Jo-Anne Bousquet]

Hi Heather......sooooo sorry for your loss....I lost the love of my life a month ago...sometimes its so hard to function day to day....today is a beautiful day but I can't enjoy it cause he should be here.....we were raising my 3 yr old g'daughter  so I guess that's what keeps me going....so keep going for your son....believe me I know its hard,and nothing anyone says is gonna make you feel better..unfortuatley grief is the worst thing imaginable...I guess we just have to keep the faith.....easier said than done sometimes.....take care ......   

[Heather]

Thank you, I am sorry for your loss also!! Today was actually our son's 2nd Birthday. I had my mind made up that i wasn't doing anything and last minute i decided thats not fair to him!! I'm his only normal now and its My responsibility to have fun with him, teach him, appreciate him and give him the best life I possibly can!! The party is now over and Im glad i did It! He had a blast and it got us out of the house for a while. I know that this will never be easy and that We will always miss them, just takin it one day at a time. I wish you and your granddaughter the best and looking forward to someday We all will be reunited in Heaven with them again!!

[Jo-Anne Bousquet]

   Heather,

  So glad you went thru with the party. What a huge step that was and you should be proud. You are right it definatley isn't easy and somedays it's worse than hard. I hate the missing part, seems like that's all I can think about. Our whole idea of normal has done a complete 180. Haven't slept or even made the bed. His clothes are where he left them. I don't know if that's good or bad, I think if I put them away then that makes it real.......God Bless everyone that is going thru the grief of losing a part of themselves. We need to keep the faith and you are right...WE WILL MEET AGAIN IN HEAVEN!

[Anita Malone-Harris]

I'm so sorry that anyone has to suffer through a loss. I lost my 19 yr old on April 26th. Still no cause has been found. I didn't cry on mother's day because I stayed busy cleaning. I go back to work today and I'm dragging this morning. I'm afraid of how I will react to comments. I pray I make it through the entire day.

[Heather]

I hope you are doing ok at work this week. My prayers go out to you. I had a hard time going back also but now I find its atleast a good way to stay busy. I know how you feel with the comments I've had alot of people come to me to tell me "what they have heard" I even had a lady ask me if the autopsy was back yet, and when I told her no she proceeded to give me the report that she's "already heard." These things can be extremely hurtful and they make your mind start to wonder all over the place. Some people need to gossip to exist and dont realize that this is not gossip for us, its our life. I just let her say what shes going to say and let it go right out the other ear. You have to or it would eat you alive. Im still struggling but I try not to let myself think about it.