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i lost my partner & companion & best friend ever three weeks ago ,i live alone & im still iin shock! Im afraid to sleep because the memorys start up in my head like a movie that wont stop! i feel like im all alone & will always stay like this, i see my partner every where & in everything we diid & i feel like iam haunted. its so hard to bear & i sure feel for you & your dear children. please find you very best friend & pour some of the grief out,we can not bear this alone & we have no time limit to recover, Hold on & ask jesus to heal you, He will1 Ronnie in Va.
Joanna, I want to express my sincere sympathy. I am just inclined to ask: how can such dreadful things happen. It was 6 mths. ago yesterday that my wife, the love of my life, passed over. I miss her beyond words and expression of feelings. This is the saddest thing I can imagine. I want you to know that even though we don't know each other, I'm willing to be that person you can correspond with anytime you need.
Most Sincerely,
Ted
Joanna,
I can't say, I know how you feel, because no one can know how another feels. That said, I too have been shunned by family, friends, and loved ones since the passing of my wife. And, I don't have a clue what the hell is going on. It hurts so bad. I can't even begin to understand it. I always thought at times like this, loved ones would rally around to provide support. What I've found is abandonment, loneliness, and devastating emptiness &sadness.
I agree with you on people disappear quick. My husband was the one who knew everyone and so most of the people were his friends. With the exception of a few who text me regularly the others have long forgotten. And that get's me the maddest not even for myself but I don't want people to forgot my husband or the great person he was. I don't want people to say oh yeah poor rich he was a great guy who died from lung cancer, because he sure as heck didn't want people to remember him because he got cancer and died at 53. And I feel the same way that people don't wanna hear you any more. Like they want you to say "oh I'm great, the world's wonderful" when it's the furthest thing from the truth. Things I did to make the house nice for him and the kids don't mean the same thing anymore to me. Yes, I'm doing everything but that's the extent of it. It will be 11 months on the 27th since he passed away and the pain and loneliness feel worse than the first month. Now it's final... and everywhere I look in the house I think of something we worked on together to make our house our home... and I miss the time (even if it wasn't a lot every day) that we had a chance just to have a conversation (usually while I was in the kitchen cleaning up or making lunches) we would be able to catch up on the day.. even if it was only 5 minutes. IDK i texted today and said oh I'm always super busy but I'm always by myself.. and that was fine when I knew he would eventually be coming home at the end of the nite. Now it's a different world and a lonely world.
Joanna,
You children. Just for now, stay with the children. In mind, In heart and In soul. Stay with your children. Just hold them.
Ted
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