I lost my dad in 2009, he committed suicide, and my brother just this past october. I totally understand you having those haunted images in your head that are unwanted but you cant help but see. I can just tell you as time goes on those images will start to be replaced with happy memories. its is no longer painful to remember your loved one. that is how I felt at least with my dad, but now that my brother is gone...I am struggling all over again. just give it time, always have someone to turn to who will be there even if you just need to tell them you are sad or struggling. take it one day at a time. But know that you are not alone and try your best to think of happy memories of your brother and know how proud he would have been of you, and how much he loved you. that's, at least, what I am trying to do.