More than 2 years later?

[Jess]

Hi
I've never really done this before but I'm really struggling at the moment. My mum died just over 2 years ago on the 4th July 2013 and it's her birthday tomorrow.
Everyday I feel normal and happy even though there's always at least one thing that reminds me of her, but some days I feel really alone. I've never really talked to my dad or my 5 siblings who are all much older than me and I don't know how to bring it up with my friends. It just seems like everybody has moved on.
Is it normal to still feel like I'm breaking apart sometimes but perfectly happy other times and to still feel like this 2 years later?

[Lulu]

HI Jess

The years will pass the loss is always there and it may seem like your friends and family  moved on but in reality they may feel like you do. Loss is such a hard topic to talk about sometimes people prefer to keep their feelings to themselves  .

In special occasions feelings become stronger, try and do something special for her something you know she would enjoy something sweet in her memory for her birthday. 

You may feel guilty at times that you feel happy with your life and that brings you to fall apart knowing shes not here to share in that happyness. In memory of her try fighting that stuggle and remember this is the way she wants you to be.

[Alex565]

Welocome Jess,

I know it's hard and difficult at times, I'm at my all time lo in my life after my parents died last year, and I ask myself everyday why now? It's been almost a year since the parents died, the fact of the matter is that everyone is different, I too have family that has moved on went on with life and never bring it up in conversation, do they still feel pain I would like too say probably but it might be too painful too talk about it.

As for holidays and birthdays, last year for thanksgiving and Christmas I went out too eat at a restaurant I didn't want any reminders of the parents not being here enjoying the holidays.
Now birthdays dads birthday was in April and he loved Kentucky fried chicken, so I went too KFC while I was eating I said happy birthday dad, Just part of the healing process, dad was a difficult man too understand he loved too eat and work no hobbies whatsoever.
Moms birthday was in June, and I worked through her birthday and I still didn't want too accept that she was gone, Now this month I am making steps towards accepting that she's no longer in human form, and maybe that's why it's been so difficult,
Anyway mom loved flowers so I went and bought a plant because I knew that was many things that she enjoyed, I still have the plant and believe it or not I felt better.

So the pain is very normal, I say do something that your mom liked too do.
Keep us posted Jess and take care.