Still can't breath

[Ty Prather]

I made it through the first month. I just finished decorating the Christmas tree and the only thing I want for Christmas Santa just can't bring. Can someone tell me how you stop crying especially when people tell you to try and be happier and you just want to scream at them. He was my husband and best friend and we could talk for hours about anything and everything. It's so silent now my ears feel so empty. This is the second time I have lost a husband and both were during holidays.

[Judy Davidson]

Dear Ty,

Welcome to Grief Hope Network and thank you for sharing your story and your feelings.  I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your husband.  And for the second time :(  As you know, all the 'firsts' are difficult.  Feel free to virtually scream, rant and rage here; we all get it. It was a slow process for me after my husband died also.  You have made a BIG first step in reaching out to others who know how you feel.  Grief always waits, so it's never too late to start the process of dealing and healing.   

All members here have empathy for what you are going through.  I'm recovering from the loss of my mother in February.   My husband passed away in 2004 and I started this site to help others a few years ago.  Please reach out to other members through the Network, Member Blogs and Forum Chats.  The chat room tends to have more people in it at night.  The Home Page has some good Blog Posts too.  I pray the resources here provide Help for Today & Hope for Tomorrow.  You take good care of yourself.  BIG hug!    

God bless,

Judy

Founding member

[Judy Davidson]

And I admire you for putting up the Christmas tree.  Even if you're just going through the motions, traditions like that might help you feel a wee bit better.

[Lulu]

sorry to hear about the loss of your husband. And i know it must be hard decorting the tree but its also nice therapy dedicating the tree to him. Jeff passed away two years ago on the day of your post and for me the first year was hardest I was able to find help with this site and in person grief groups. Talking about him sharing his story helps sooth the pain . Or maybe doing a journal putting your feelings in words. Stay strong. 

[Carmen Anwi]

Sorry about your loss.I know right.I believe crying helps.It takes the pain away even if its just for a while.I donot think you should hurry the grieving period.I know you want the pain to stop,we all do.I believe if you try to escape this stage it will come by later on.My advise just try to face it.I do not know if u are christian but hope and faith will make you feel a lot better.He is engraved on your heart now and know that he is with you everytime and he is watching over you.

[DAV F]

I read this today that you need to say hello to grief he's your friend now, and you need to know him.

I'm trying this and it might help..